Friendship at work
All of us work takes most of the time and life. It is a pity if it does not cause pleasant feelings, but only discontent and fatigue, and colleagues seem unpleasant people. On the other hand, it is worth reducing the distance a little - and you are no longer able to refuse the request, since you are not asked by a simple employee, but by a friend. Is it possible to find a middle ground between working relationship and friendship, and is it important to share these concepts?
In every society, you can find pretty people. And if such feelings are mutual, then you can try to become friends or friends. But if a person is working with you side by side, then first carefully think about whether to translate the working relationship into a friendship.
Features of friendship at work
It would seem to make friendships necessary. After all, friends are people who will cover and help, support and reassure. In work situations often arise when help is needed. And not just by phone advice, but in practice. Such help is beyond the power of friends that are not related to your company. And you still have to sooner or later turn to your own colleagues.And well, if among them will be a person who has a friendly sympathy for you. But there are some features of friendship with colleagues.
Friendly relationships with colleagues, of course, are important. But always remember to be careful.
You can use the help of a fellow colleague several times, and then you will get used to such support. Yes, and he himself can use your help, in which there is nothing shameful, because you are friends. Outside of work, this person can also often appear next to you. Especially if you have a common interest. Then you will get even closer. And it will begin to seem that such a friendship has no disadvantages. Until a certain moment everything will be exactly like this, you will not notice the danger to which you are putting yourself.
We all know that "friendship is friendship, and service is a service." But few people apply the saying in practice. And now imagine the situation that you have an increase in the company. And the applicants are you and your buddy. Do not assume that friendship will save you from rivalry. Even more, if a person knows your weaknesses, he can use them against you, in order to exclude an opponent. Do not think that friendship will save from betrayal, because for many people work and money is more important.
Even if you do not take a raise as an example, then a different situation will arise. You will say something sharp to the person, he will keep silent in reply, and then will inform the chief that you left work earlier. Anyway, there is always such a risk. A person is able to substitute another in any minute.
Our world is cynical and cruel. And if you put friendship on one side of the scale and position and benefit on the other, most people will choose money and profit.
Should I be friends at work
Friendship with a colleague may seem attractive, because these are joint trips to a cafe during a break, to a “smoking room”, discussion of management, meetings, etc. The normal atmosphere in the team will be beneficial, but the division into interests becomes a negative trend.
If you tell a colleague-friend some secret, or he knows about your weaknesses, then there is no guarantee that he will not take advantage of this.
Indeed, in the course of close communication, their own interests begin to prevail over work, pushing it aside. And if, as already mentioned, a better place to raise appears, what will a friend do? Is it worth it to be friends with colleagues? Would a buddy be a competitor?These questions are important to ask yourself before you get close to people. Rivalry at work is normal, but when it occurs among friends, it does not cause any pleasant emotions.
Friendship with the boss
It should be understood that the friendship with the head will certainly turn into the fact that you will be considered a pet, sodden, etc. The team always perceives ambiguously the relationship between subordinates and superiors, if they are not only business ones. And if you are friends with a manager and you have a different gender, then gossip and gossip will not keep you waiting.
Of course, you will receive more information, but the responsibility will increase. In the friendly relations between the boss and the employee, it is impossible not to see the greed of the latter, psychologists say, and if you become a friend of the boss, then your status is a priori elevated.
In the famous TV series about Dr. House, he was asked why he was mistreating employees. To which House responded, on the contrary, he treats them remarkably, because with such behavior he forces workers to compete and do their job better. And if you let them get involved in each other and relationships, then they will forget about work.
Working friendship between a man and a woman
As for the friendship between a man and a woman, a lot of jokes have been invented about this, and the debate on this issue has not subsided to this day. Someone believes that without sexual connotations, there is no friendship between people of different sexes, others with fury prove the opposite.
Regarding such friendly relationships at work, double caution is required here. Due to frequent communication, unpleasant rumors arise, and if one of you is a manager, do not expect anything good. But moderately friendly communication is beneficial: sometimes it is easier to get advice from a person of the opposite sex, and unobtrusive flirting helps defuse the situation. The main thing here is not to get involved. It is impossible to completely avoid friendly relations at work, because this makes a human outcast.
Friendship with the boss or the opposite sex is always an object of gossip and gossip. Before you start such a relationship, think carefully.
And if you believe polls, then:
23% of the inhabitants of our country voluntarily agree to tasks that are not included in their duties;
36% of residents think about the service almost always;
22% continue to "work" in a dream;
39% of respondents consider themselves to be workaholics and do not believe that this is bad;
and 40% are sure that being a workaholic is harmful.
Borders in relationships at work
It is important to understand that at work there should be the same boundaries in the relationship, as elsewhere. It is important to establish and observe them immediately. For example, you can easily linger or stay at work in order to help a friend finish an annual report or with a balance sheet. But lying to the authorities that the employee does not know where the packaging went with the paper when her friend took them home is another matter.
It often happens that people are alienated from employees, become isolated, do not communicate with anyone. This is also easily explained. Each person has their own history, their own problems. But complete alienation should not be present, because communication is a part of life and work. Such behavior creates boundaries and barriers with other colleagues. Such a person may feel that they do not take him into the company, therefore he begins to ignore others not only personally but also professionally.
So that this does not happen in a team, you should not discuss personal life or private moments at work. It's better to concentrate on work here.If you close on a friendship with someone, it will not benefit the team. Instead of sharing a secret with secrets away from everyone, join a company of colleagues and talk on common topics. This includes everything: a hobby, a discussion of movies, walks, entertainment.
It is necessary to realize the importance of the boundaries of working friendship and friendly relations with colleagues outside of work. Think first before telling such buddies something.
It has long been known that if people at work are friendly, a friendly atmosphere reigns, then work is done faster and easier. Current tasks can be more effectively performed together, and in the formation of difficulties, you can always consult with each other.
Work - this is certainly a team, which will have to get used to. For this reason, remain extremely cautious, because "friends" are often able to bring and substitute. Keep the distance, do not give out information about yourself that you can use against and to harm. You should not discuss or gossip about the leaders. After all, maybe a colleague will remain silent, but if not, and the boss will find out everything? Sore topics are shared with friends who are not related to work.
Of course, one cannot say that friendship is bad. Sometimes even the opposite.
Friendship is good. Research scientists
In the American Institute, which is engaged in the study of the opinions of society, conducted a study of the benefits of friendship among colleagues. Scientists have found out that this is rather a blessing. People who work together with friends differ not only in a more harmonious psychology, but also consistently give high rates of labor productivity. Such individuals are more involved in the process of work than those who do not consider colleagues to be friends.
This sociological experiment also found out that only 18% of the respondents from the millions of respondents are sure that the company's top management encourages friendship at work and is positive about this phenomenon. The explanation here is this: some heads of firms fear that colleagues will begin to be friends against managers and other workers, which will cause disharmony in the atmosphere of the team and adversely affect the results of work.
Scientists believe that a healthy, friendly atmosphere benefits working relationships and productivity.
In addition, respondents were asked to answer the question,which of the options would help you more positively perceive the work. In the role of answer options were:
salary increase in the form of 10% of the salary;
work together with a friend.
It is worth noting that the respondents chose the second variant of the answer more often.
Competent leaders encourage not just friendship among workers, but help to ensure that people bring friends to the firm that were not previously associated with the company. At some firms, bonuses for attracted friends to the team have been invented. This is usually in the form of a one-time increase or bonus. So managers achieve two goals at the same time: there is no need to spend energy on the search for employees and a favorable climate is formed in the team.
But at the same time it is important to understand that seemingly inoffensive working friendships sometimes act as a way to achieve goals or success at work, a chance to get profit. Such a “friendship” does not help to increase comfort at work, and therefore does not improve the quality of work.
Another dangerous moment, if a long-time friend and colleague suddenly gets the post of your direct supervisor. In such a situation it is very difficult to maintain friendly relations at the old level, therefore it will be necessary to distinguish between these two types of communication: old friends and a subordinate - the boss.
Why management is afraid of novels at work
It is worth noting that the chiefs often have a negative attitude towards friendship between people of the opposite sex, because they fear the birth of a novel at work. Often, companies even point out in the informal charters clauses about the inadmissibility of romantic relationships (and those who have violated this are waiting for dismissal). Although recently observed a more loyal attitude to such relationships between colleagues. And this does not become an excuse for leaving work. But this principle is still used in individual companies.
Remember that friendship is one thing, and romance is another. And the company does not always welcome such a communication style among colleagues.
The reason for this is easily explained - the bosses are afraid that the employee will fall in love with a colleague and start thinking only about this, and not about working moments. The more it becomes dangerous for the company, if this employee plays an important role in the team and the work process, there are a lot of tasks on it.
And in fact, such a policy is justified, because work and love relationships interfere with each other, love is more likely to harm productivity, as opposed to friendships.Of course, dismissal for love - a measure, rather, extreme, but we should not allow such a mixture of love and work.
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